True Dirt- Confessions of a Male Housecleaner
by
Book Details
About the Book
The most shocking and hilarious book you will read this year! Buy it now--just click "Add to Cart" above!
After one full year of perfect, honest, dependable house cleaning, our reward was in-hand: our Christmas bonus! My wife Janice and I giggled with anticipation as we removed the decorative holiday wrapping paper and bow, and lifted the lid off the box to reveal our bounty: three grapefruits and three oranges! I sprang from my seat and tore open the client’s refrigerator door.
“I KNEW it!” I screamed, pointing to the bottom tray, crammed to the hilt with two giant bags of discounted grapefruits and oranges. Our wonderful Christmas bonus, in the ever-so perfectly wrapped box, for fifty two weeks of sweat and labor, was about $1.67 worth of fruit. We don’t even LIKE fruit!
Hi, my name is Danny Praz. For the last eighteen years, my wife Janice and I have owned and operated an award-winning cleaning service. We have entertained our family and friends all these years with often shocking and uproariously funny stories about our bizarre and unbelievably strange clients. I have detailed the antics of our unusual patrons in this work I call “True Dirt: Confessions of a Male Housecleaner.” I know you are going to love this book!
There has never been anything like this before, with real stories that are truly one of a kind, including crazy new ideas like:
- The “Resenters”--A cleaning client who would rather have a slave!
- The “Kill Two Birds” Client--A patron who schedules major home construction and projects on their cleaning day!
- “Cleaning Servicitis”--A plague which causes a client to blame anything that goes wrong in their home on us, even if we were not there!
“True Dirt” includes a cast of characters that prove truth is way stranger than fiction, including:
- The wicked Mrs. Crab, who made Cinderella’s stepmother look like the tooth fairy!
- The Antarctic personality of Mrs. Da’Ghoul, whose heart was chipped from an Ice Age glacier!
- The haughty Mrs. Pig, who brazenly sprawled on her bed in the master suite, asked me for a massage, while her husband was right down stairs!
- Their names have been changed to protect me from their wrath, in case I still clean for them!
“True Dirt” also includes more than one hundred anecdotal stories, such as:
- The time I unknowingly cleaned up the blood of a dead man!
- Having a mansion owner call to complain about a missed piece of lint!
- Bumping into a female client’s obviously-used sex toy!
- Having a crotchety female client refer to me as her “cleaning girl”!
- Frightening and true ghost stories, biker-chick workers, broken priceless collectibles, knife-wielding psycho clients, intriguing conspiracies, and even death.
And you thought all I did was clean...I wish!!
Just listen to what the agents who turned me down for representation said:
- “Thanks for making me laugh so hard! I really enjoyed it, but it is not for us.” -Alan C. Kellock, The Kellock Company, Coral Springs, Florida
- “It’s absolutely hysterical. Pay me $500 up front and I’ll represent you.” -Ronda Winchell, The Author’s Agency, Boise, Idaho
- “It is well written and made me laugh out loud. But I’d rather you wrote a How-To-Clean book.” -Lettie Lee, Ann Elmo Agency, New York, New York
Sounds like these people would make great cleaning clients, don´t you think?!
But even they liked “True Dirt” and you will too! Order your copy right here, right now! It is the quickest way to get one. It makes a great gift too.
Order now! I know you will want to read ab
About the Author
After pursuing a career as a professional musician, and ending up with rising debt and frustration, author Danny Praz joined his wife, Janice, to start a home cleaning business. Good fortune and incredible stories followed the couple as they built their award winning service to a six figure income for fifteen years running. All at once hilarious, shocking, and inspiring, these true stories of their wacky clients become a one of a kind masterpiece that will surprise, entertain, and delight! Danny Praz has also penned “Making It” (Xlibris 2003), along with dozens of articles published in a variety of entertainment publications.