Learning How to F.L.Y.

I was miserable, but no one ever knew my pain. I masked it with jokes and making sure everyone was happy because I knew how it felt to be unhappy and that wasn't going to happen to anyone on my watch. My paternal grandfather had a storage house filled with all kinds of liquors. I would sneak out there and fill up my big gulp cup and drink it throughout the day at school starting in the 7th grade. No one had a clue! I was even driving myself to school because I couldn't get dressed before the bus came due to all the rituals I had to perform to keep my family alive (undiagnosed OCD). Side bar: I have to tell you about the car. It was a 5 speed manual Toyota. Dad tried to teach me how to drive it several times to no avail. He would start yelling at me, which only made me cry, and then he became even angrier because I was crying. He would tell me, "Stop all that crying!" So eventually, I learned to stop crying. He said I couldn't get my license until I learned how to drive that car! I was 16 and in love so I had to figure out a way. So as always, I prayed and asked God to help me. I didn't know how He would, but I had faith that He would and that's all I needed! I'll never forget, one night I dreamed that I was driving that car the entire night! When I woke up, I ran into the living room and said, "Dad, I know how to drive a stick shift now! I've been driving all night!" He didn't hesitate to toss me the keys and we headed out, still in my pj's. He got into the Impala and took off and I was right behind him! I didn't stall out once! We drove at least 50 miles and I never messed up; not even on a steep hill with a car behind me! Needless, to say he was shocked, and I got my license the same day!